My third husband bought me this. Give me some chips for it.

lisa simpson forty years in the future smoking and gambling and trading in a ring for some betting chips

Lisa: My third husband bought me this. Give me some chips for it.

Dealer: Are you sure, ma'am?

Lisa: Don't tell me what to do, Sonny. I've been gambling since I was eight. And I've been hockin' jewelry since I was twelve. Now give me some chips!

So that's it. You just wanted me to help you gamble. You never wanted to be with me at all.

lisa simpson crying at the dining table

Lisa: So that's it. You just wanted me to help you gamble. You never wanted to be with me at all.

Marge: You're a very selfish man.

Box: Go to hell! Go to hell!

Bart: Hey, once again. Great present, Dad.

The kids are happy, you smell like Meryl Streep, and I've got that foot massager I've always wanted.

homer simpsons using his foot massager

Look, what's the problem? The kids are happy, you smell like Meryl Streep, and I've got that foot massager I've always wanted.

Shut up. Shut up. Kiss my butt. Shut up. Go to Hell. Go to Hell.

bart simpson pressing the button on his gift from homer simpson

Shut up. Shut up. Kiss my butt. Shut up. Go to Hell. Go to Hell.

He doesn't look too happy.

football fan in only a g-string shivering in the snow

Bret: It is the playoffs, it's five below and there's one loyal fan wearing nothing but a g-string and the team colors painted on his body.

Jimmy: He doesn't look too happy.

Bret: Well, maybe the paint has shut off his pores and he's slowly suffocating. Still, that is a real fan.