Showing posts with label Ozzie Smith. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ozzie Smith. Show all posts

Once you go in, you may never come out.

ozzie smith falling into a bottomless pit

Ozzie Smith: How long does it take to see this thing? I'm kind of in a hurry.

Ticket taker: Well, it's hard to say, my friend. Once you go in, you may never come out.

Ozzie Smith: Wow! One please.

You will give one hundred and ten percent.

hypnotist hypnotizing the springfield nuclear power plant softball team

Hypnotist: You are all very good players.

All the players: [hypnotized] We are all very good players.

Hypnotist: You will beat Shelbyville.

All the players: [hypnotized] We will beat Shelbyville.

Hypnotist: You will give one hundred and ten percent.

All the players: [hypnotized] That's impossible. No one can give more than one hundred percent. By definition that is the most any one can give.